2007

One Year On

One year ago today, my life as I knew it came crashing down... Today is my Dad's first death anniversary. A year ago, around this time, I got home and found my Dad sitting in his f…

Dyke Drama

I was 40 mins into the final episode of Heroes Season 1 at 12:30 pm last night when I heard someone knocking on my window. At first I thought it was my neighbour, but after taking …

Post X'mas Thoughts...

So Christmas is over. I decided to rid myself of the festive theme and put up a holding theme while I design my next theme. Was gonna do a New Year's one, but didn't find a suitabl…

Pride Shots!

Pictures of Irene's Makeover Part 2! Irene dressed in totally "Femme" mode Irene and me before heading to the party Had a great time at Jean's party last night. Jin's place is tota…

Introducing... Mango & Chipmunk!

I now have Hammies!~ 2 of them! And they are damn freaking adorable! Mango falling asleep on top of Chipmunk while we were getting their cage set up. Their bungalow of a cage inclu…

Anj & Kai's Christmas Party

Attended Anj and Kai's Christmas Party last night. Have to say that their invitation was really cool... Address blanked out for privacy's sake The setting of Kai's place is really …

Baby Jayden Visits His Godma!

My darling godson came for a surprise visit today Was so very happy to see him. He is turning out to be a very inquisitive baby. He was actually sleeping when he got to my place, b…

Indu's Surprise Party & KTV part II

It was Indu's birthday on the 19th and since she was in India on that day, Badriah decided to organise a surprise party for her last night. The party was at Hotel 81 Bencoolen and …

Unexpected Great Late Night Out

A one on one dinner with Lisa tonight turned into a 5 woman boardgames marathon and its seriously been a while since I laughed so much! It all started when Lisa arranged to meet me…

The Story Of...

... a Princess & her Bunny. Yesterday, a Princess & her Bunny had Firsts... ... Official DateOne month after we decide to go on dates, we finally get to go on our first date. ... P…

I Wish...

... I had a Snuggle Buddy tonight.

Solitary Monday...

Slept pretty badly last night. Tossed and turned over and over. Woke up sweating cos I had accidentally put the aircon on timer. Went back to sleep again, submerging myself in craz…

When Push Comes To Shove...

... Don't expect me to constantly accept apologies.... Don't expect me to keep on giving chances.... Don't expect me to turn around and smile.... Don't expect me to understand. I a…

A Moment In Time

We were given 5 minutes during the session today to draw an image that represents intimacy to us. For me, the immediate image that jumped into my mind was of the above. It was a ve…

Crazy Days and Mad Nights

Played mahjong on friday night and did some crazy minimal sleep and food thing over the past 2 days. Lost money at mahjong but since it was to Irene's mom, its all good! Took some …

Unspoken Words

A SmileA KissA Gesture Each GiftEach WordEach Memory I Think I Feel I Miss Some DaySome TimeSome Possibility

Negative & Positive Energy

Been thinking about the Negative and Positive impacts people have on each other's lives. Some people exude Positive energy and can make the people around them feel wonderfully happ…

Christmas Cravings

Since everyone has been asking me what I want for Christmas and the big day is only 10 days away, I've decided to put together a wishlist. Feel free to refer to it to get an idea o…

Hangover

OMG!It has been years since I drink until I puke. However, I had so much fun last night, drinking, dancing and partying that there are no regrets!Corona BeerViceroy SticksFive TenV…

Bus Stop

Stranger in the corner,Fresh breeze across faces,Light drizzle of midnight rain. Skin on skin,Tentative connections,Warm heat that spreads within. Eyes slowly shut,Tongues tentativ…

Food! Glorious Food!

Potluck last night was soooooooo fun! We had an overflow of food since everyone cooked more than was expected. We had Japanese Curry Rice, Mee Siam, Sushi, Emperor's Chicken, Salad…

Thank You...

... For Caring.... For Being Honest.... For Helping Me Feel Again.... For Giving Me A Place In Your Heart.

Disconnected Again!

So yes, my laptop crashed and burned on Wednesday night. This means that net access will once again be limited until it gets back from the service centre. Optimistically, they said…

Happy Birthday Shawn!

Happy Birthday Bear Wong! Hope you have a great year ahead! Me with the Birthday Boy Shawn Me with Irene Me with the Gay Boy Ben More pics to be posted later when the cake cutting …

Yuletide Cheer

Found myself humming along to some Christmas songs played by Singapore's Military Marching Band when I saw them marching down Orchard Road on Sunday afternoon after my support grou…

Revamp

Once again we are going through a revamp. Please be patient while I work this out. Watch this space!

Love, Or Something Like It...

I used to believe in Forever Love. Now I've become bitter and cynical towards Love. I remember when I was young, I entered each relationship with passion and idealistic ideas of Lo…

LIV - 2.4 Aftermath

We moved into a room in a HDB flat in Hougang. Mom, her bf then and me. 3 people in a tiny room. We cooked on a small portable cooker. There was no fridge. Was even worst when Gran…

Random Thoughts

Almond Roca Heart-Shaped Cushions Many Lives, Many Masters Apple Flavoured Yakult Enoki Mushrooms FFXI Blue Studs Ikea StarDust Evanescence

Ouch

It is past 4 am and even though I've slept so little over the past 2 days, I am still awake because the various aches and pains in my body are bothering me. For some reason I've be…

Project One Completed

Took me over 5 weeks to get around to doing up my room so its actually livable again. Its ironic though, because eventually, it just took me 3 days last week to get it entirely cle…

Motherly Instinct

Went to visit Baby Jayden with Irene on Saturday before the KTV session. Carrying him in my arms while he dosed snuggled up to me felt so good. It makes me wonder when it will be m…

Flowers & Chocolates

Had a pretty emo night on Sunday and went to bed feeling extremely fucked up, but woke up to a fairly pleasant surprise on Monday morning. Incessant knocking at 11 am kinda pissed …

Everytime...

...I think I have it under control, I lose it. ...I think I have moved on, something pulls me back. ...I think it doesn't matter anymore, it suddenly smashes right into me.

Bitter Sweet Memories...

Love still burns within me,It hurts to feel it, Please set me free. Rip my heart out,Contaminate my soul, Drive me to insanity. Give me the tears,So it forms my pool of reality, An…

Emo Songs

Just got back from KTV session with the Sayoni girls. After the bantering around on the forum all week, was glad to see that there was a decent turnout. Had a great time especially…

Mood Swings

For some reason mood swings are back again. I've been taking my pills religiously every night and I've been occupying my days and nights fairly well. In fact, got a lot accomplishe…

Great Monday

Slept in this morning and woke up feeling refreshed. Nua-ed in bed for a bit before heading out to lunch, a movie and dinner with Lisa. Once again I had a great time with her. Ente…

LIV - 2.3 Dark Days

The FluA FeverThe ColdA Cough Dark RoomBright LightRough HandsRubbing Vicks Some TearsMuch FearLocked DoorSilent Screams

What Does Love Mean To Me?

During the group session today, we were told to use modeling clay to make a sculpture of what we thought love meant to us. This was what I came up with... Front View Top View When …

Introducing Baby Jayden...

Went for my Godson Jayden's 1 month party yesterday... He is such an adorable little baby. I am so in love with him. Totally going to spoil him to BITS! My first photo with Jayden …

Why...

Does It Always Have To Be So Complicated? Can't It Just Be Simple And Straight Forward? Is There Always Drama?

The Joys Of Being Single

I haven't been entirely single in over 12 years. This is the first time that a relationship has ended for me without another one looming in the distance. When the full impact of my…

I Like...

Waking Up With A Smile On My Face...

My PlayGym Bunny!

Went shopping today and picked out an outfit for my personal PlayGym Bunny... Enjoy!

Days

It's been an interesting few days that has made me really appreciate some of the new people in my life. Tuesday was spent with a new listener, a french movie with an incredibly hot…

Emotions

For you, I walked a hundred miles,I should have just stopped there.The pain, it caused both you and me,I wish I could just bear. For you, I wrote a thousand words,I screamed that i…

Independance

I.I live.I learn.I survive. Independance.It was who I was.It eluded me for a year.It will be part of me again.

Refreshed

Had a great time with family over the past few days. Reminds me of how isolated I've been over the past year... and makes me appreciate family even more...I feel myself gaining my …

Revealations

Thank you for everyone who has been there. You've helped me see the light.Each word, each action, each smile, each hug.My life no longer feels like an aimless journey.I am who I am…

Bridges

Something happened today that spurred me to start mending bridges. One step at a time.The road to recovery is long, but worthwhile...

LIV - 2.2 Connection

In between the years in primary school, I became aware of certain things as I grew older.Someone kept sending boxes of M&Ms and Gummy Bears for me. It was unexplainable, but I knew…

LIV - 2.1 Backseat

Things changed when my brother was born. He was a sickly baby who was born premature and had to be hospitalised due to various complications including pneumonia and bronchitis. I r…

Therapy

Had a very good group session this afternoon. Hearing what other people had to say and I found myself sharing things that I wasn't even aware of. Sometimes its amazing to find out …

LIV - 1.2 Family

Somewhere between the ages of 3 and 4, Uncle James became Papa. I don't remember the transition, although I do remember living in a huge bungalow house at Haig Road that had a big …

LIV - 1.1 Beginnings

I was an adorable baby loved by everyone in my family. The eldest grandchild on my maternal side. Perhaps it was because I was the first, everyone showered their love and attention…

The Demons Within

I've had alot of time to read and think over the past week. The complete break from my normal routine has been painful, but yet surprisingly healing. Sleeping in unfamiliar places,…

CHARACTER

I read through my blogs of the past 12 months. I've always used my blogs as a sounding board for my own emotions and feelings. Reading them now made me realise that I had already i…

SELFISHNESS

What I learnt about myself yesterday...I have been SELFISH.With no concern or care for the people who love and care for me, I have been constantly selfish. I have taken their love …

Reality

It hit me in the face. I need to talk to you, but I don't know where to start. I know you are angry, hurt, disappointed, stressed, frustrated. Nothing I can do now but to feel even…

Disconnected

Desktop at home issn't working. No laptop to work from. Only form of internet right now is my phone. Don't even have a phone charger. This is not working out so well. Maybe the sol…

5 AM

Woke up with a start to the sound of thunder and rain. How apt that even the skies paint the right picture of how I feel right now. Have I been so totally blind tt I took everythin…

14 Months Down The Road

It would have been 14 months today. Instead, I am back home, with barely half of the things that I've accumulated at your place over the past months. It's going to take at least 2 …

Where do I go from here?

I am alone. The paths intersecting before me. A million crossroads ahead. Which path do I walk down? I've lost everything that has any meaning to me whatsoever. Now I need to find …

LOST

Entirely & utterly lost. Don't know who I am, where I am, what I am doing. The line finally snapped. It was heading there for a while now, even as I tried to ignore the symptoms. I…

HAHA

Quote of the day: "Is there flirting going on?"

New You, New Me

Bintan was an eye opening experience. Having seen how slow people can move in Manila, I was pleasently surprised that at least in Indonesia, its not that slow. But, compared to Sin…

Cartoon Network at 3 am!

Watching Cartoon Network while waiting for my hair to dry so I can sleep. I can't believe they show such cartoons to kids! What are they teaching our future? Such violence, sarcasm…

Smiles

Sometimes the hardest word to say is "Sorry"

Upgrades

Long shopping trip today at Sim Lim Square. Went there at around 2:30 pm and didn't get out til almost 8 pm. Had a long list of things I needed to buy, including RAM for my IBM, RA…

Been to Bintan, Thought of Phuket...

Went to Bintan for a site recee today with Kevin. Think I was too pampered by the trip to Phuket earlier this year. The Twin Palms resort was really so beautiful that even though K…

Panic Panic Panic

Been feeling panic attacks rising up today. Couldn't get a grip for some reason. Just seems like there is so much to do and so many things rushing towards me. Totally unprepared fo…

Money

Been thinking about what it means to be spoilt. And somehow realised that I've been fairly fortunate in the sense that when I was born, our family was fairly well off and I was giv…

Love != Attachment

Read something interesting on Anj's blog today. She made a very good point. We can never truly understand feelings. For everything, there are always mixed emotions. Her definition …

For those who know what its like...

I simply couldn't resist putting up this icon... You know what I mean?

EMO EMo Emo...

*sigh* What I wouldn't give for a vacation right now. Far far away from everything and maybe just the sun, sand, sea and a good book to keep me company... Grim Reaper...

Love is...

... giving up what you want and realising that you should do what you don't want in order to achieve happiness for someone else. ... understanding that the harder you try, the deep…

Hello Stranger...

"You had me at 'Hello'" "The hardest part of love isn't loving someone, but having the courage to let them love you back." "I came here tonight because when you realize you want to…

Highway to Heaven or Hell

At times like these, when I'm working towards a certain goal, I find myself wondering if I will ever get to my final destination. The plan over the past 3 weeks has been to get wor…

Getting Over It

I think I might actually be getting over my PINK phase. Had been in that phase for over 5 years, beginning back in 2002 I think. It doesn't scream at me so much anymore. Been feeli…

Faith

I saw a star shine bright last night. It winked at me. And along came a heart shaped cloud, that embraced the star and kept it warm. Thus a heart and a star came together in loving…

Pressure

What constitutes pressure? Is it the constant reminder on what is expected from you? Or is it the nagging feeling at the back of your head which you can't seem to run away from? Wh…

Tipping Point

Been facing alot of problems at work and having a hard time trying to get everything done because there just aren't enough hours in a day! Even if you gave me 48 hours in a day, I …

Bad Product Ad Placement?

Came across these online. You really need to know what is taking the ad space next to you before splashing out cash for a billboard!

Cooking & Baking

Had a sudden urge to cook today. Woke up fairly early to go to Carrefour and buy ingrediants. Shepherds Pie for lunch which ended up being for dinner and Tiramisu cake for dessert.…

Home is where the heart is

"You don't have to come back tonight if you don't want to" But I never said I was going anywhere... and there is no place else I would rather be then to be at home with you.

Technology

You know technology has improved by leaps and bounds when you can sit at the styling chair in a salon and blog about how nice your new haircut & colour is going to turn out. Have h…

Pissed

I don't appreciate being yelled at when I've been trying my best to keep atop of things both within my accounts and within the office. Certain issues i.e clients, are not within my…

Question posed by someone from the past:

Question: In a relationship, what should the rule be? Absolute trust, or absolute disclosure? They seem similar, but they are 2 sides of a common problem in any relationship. What …

The stuff best friends are made of:

Excerpts from a MSN conversation today where I was bemoaning the fact that I've become a pathetic needy freak who can't seem to make the one person who means the world to me unders…

Untitled entry

情 爱是希望她比我快乐，每天可以过的很幸福，起床时脸上带着笑容，睡眠时心里充满甜密。 亲是希望家人会团圆，一家大小都健康平安，小孩读书都用功努力，成人事业都步步高升。 友是希望可以常见面，在一起份想喜怒哀乐，开兴时可以大家庆祝，伤心时可以一起分担。 没有爱情会令我思落，没有亲情会令我难过，没有友情会令我寂寞，情是我生命的註题曲。

Dreams

I had a series of wild and strange dreams last night where everything seemed to melt together and didn't make sense at all. It started with a wedding at a very beautiful cathedral.…

Custard?

Joke of the day: At going home time...Ash: "Shall we go home and make custard?" Me: "Ok" Instant reaction Liz: "CUSTARD! CUSTARD! CUSTARD!" Ash (Looking over to me): "We got say wa…

Therapy

Why is retail therapy so fleeting? Felt so happy yesterday after buying something for myself. Not so happy about it today. Having second thoughts Darn, why so fickle huh? Not sure.…

Peace

To quote a kotek "Make Lurrrrrrrve Not Warrrrrrrrrr!" Sometimes the pressures of being in an unhappy relationship can really get to you. When that pressure is lifted, you can feel …

Pain

Its been a fairly fruitful day at work. Although its been very busy, I've managed to get alot of work cleared, more then I normally do on a Monday. The feeling is good. Been trying…

Who Am I?

I've lost myself over the past few months, ever since my world came crashing down. I have failed to rise to many occasions and have generally given myself a chance to wallow into d…

Home

Slept 6 hours out of the whole 60 hours I was in Manila. 10%! WOW! Talk about being efficient! Was exhuasted when I got home today, but still managed to drag myself to the office a…

Grrrr

Don't you really just love it when some people do things that are simply BUAY SUI?

Arrival

Am safe & sound @ Intercontinental Manila right now. Have a little bit of time to get myself orientated before setup starts. Hotel room is nice. Updates after setup tonight!

Preparation

1:30 am in the morning and I'm printing stuff to bring along to Manila with me. Client sending me emails now, including stuff like Emcee script which is my reading material on the …

Flight

Confirmed itinerary for Manila trip as below: 29 August 2007SIN -> MNL Departs: 9:45 amArrives: 1:15 pm 31 August 2007MNL -> SINDeparts: 8:20 amArrives: 11:50 am Concerned parties,…

WTF?

Today: "Martinis Make Me Laugh""Tell me how much it cost. I'll tell you if I want to pay for it." " I can only do >THIS< much""Fuck you for putting all the pressure on me. I'm nobo…

Friends

Met with Michelle today to discuss her wedding plans which is happening on next Saturday. I'm so happy for her! She doesn't seem to be having any of those last minute bride breakdo…

Kids

Today, our STK welcomed a new LIM into his family. Congratulations Boss! We know junior has been a long awaited addition and wish you and Celia all the best with your little bundle…

One Year Today...

A year of happiness, A year of tears... A year of convergence, A year of divergence... Will there be more years to come? Or will this be the end of the road? Questions which have n…

Time & Money

How much can you fight before everything drags you down and drowns you? How much pressure can you take before the dam finally bursts? Someone told me recently that these should be …

Mentally & Physically Exhausted...

Its been an incredibly long and draining week... After all the planning and mad last minute rushing around, we're finally done with a major golf event yesterday. While I've done al…

PLU, Sayoni & Indignation

When I got in contact with Sharon a few weeks ago, she got all excited when I came out to her and told her I was dating Ash. She then proceeded to introduce me to 3 fairly importan…

Week Long Update

Haven't blogged in the past week as my Auntie Lina was in town. She got here on Tuesday last week and just left for Hong Kong on Sunday. Was a good time as its been almost 2 years …

That which does not kill you will only make you stronger...

As an add-on to the previous post, I realised something abt my relationship with Ash. Things had gotten to this point because of the wrong views and expectations I had of our relat…

Motivation... Or rather, the lack of it...

When push comes to shove, how do you react to the crunch time? Lying in bed, trying to fall asleep, I suddenly realised 2 things about myself. 1) my lack of motivation stems from m…

THE GEEK IN ME

I've always had some sort of geek in me, whether in my choices of movies to watch, books to read or things to do. It doesn't help that I love Sci-Fi/Fantasy and am wildly in love w…

LIFE, or something like it...

I remember reading Great Expectations by Charles Dickens, the abridged version back in primary school. Later on in life, I dissected the full version as part of a literature course…

What makes a girl tick?

Been watching The L Word recently and seeing how girls handle relationships on the show makes me realise that we, females, are a complicated group of people. Irregardless of whethe…

I am in L.O.V.E. !!!

OMG! Just finished watching first season of "The L Word" and I am hugely in love with KATHERINE MOENNIG who plays SHANE MCCUTCHEON. She is so damn HOT!!! I just wanna lick her up l…

Procon BBQ - 30th June 2007

Had quite a good time at the BBQ last night. Too bad Denise was sick and couldn't join us. Anyhow, InnerCity Lofts is a nice place and their skydeck open pool BBQ area was kinda ni…

2007 Part II!

New Hairstyle... I haven't had short hair in 15 years... Last time I had hair this short, I was in Primary 6... How fast time flies! This is a new and refreshing look though... I l…

In case you were wondering...

The photo in my last entry was my attempt to photoblog using my new Nokia E61i. Only problem was I couldn't figure out how to rotate the picture. Also, the text that I had with the…

Yay! New phone!

Being A Workaholic Finally Pays Off

After almost 4 years of working so hard, my investment in Procon has finally reaped some rewards. Having enough money to buy what my family needs and also invest in pretty things f…

Happy Birthday...

With Much Love And Warm Wishes...

In the Office at 2:30 am on a Friday night/Saturday morning...

The only cool thing about being in the office at this time, is that the rest of the gang is here. Got to love my Liz & my Ash Some days I think we are each other's best friend. It'…

Midway thru Hellweek 5.3

Its become a living hell, trying to coordinate various projects for 3 major clients and at the same time plan their yearly calendar for them. Its cute when you realise how little p…

1st Email Posting that works

So apparantly email posting works now. Yay! Now I can blog easily while I'm on th go... What I need next is to get the Nokia E61i so I can take pictures and post them along with my…

Retail therapy - Oh So Good!

Felt great to go girly shopping with Liz today. I had a hella a time trying shoes and clothes. Bought a new pair of shoes, 2 pairs of capris and 4 dresses.... It also feels good to…

Untitled entry

& you can see this at S*P for the next 24 hours

Grandma had a stroke + Laptop charger died + Email posting doesn't work :(

So this sucks. My laptop charger died over the weekend. Laptop has only 50% left on battery... MUST CONSERVE UNTIL I FIND A REPLACEMENT... Walked all over Sim Lim yesterday and the…

Icy Cold Knot

I had an amazingly vivid dream of you last night. Every touch, every word. Felt Real. In fact, just 2 hours ago, I woke up with the warmest feeling of the greatest love, but at the…

Belated Update - Em's Hen Night

The T-shirt Bon printed for Em that had people staaaaaaaaring at her all night Ended the night with drinks at Loof.

Random Thoughts

There are good days and there are bad days. But I've come to realise that the bad days are what make the good days good. Someone once asked me if I would rather live a life of medi…

:(

I hate when i'm facing internal struggles. When I have to talk to myself to rationalise things. The crazy frustration of having to assure yourself that you're not going crazy, thou…

THE ONE THAT ENDS ALL THE ONES

Why is it so hard to make things work? Why is it so hard for anyone to love?Pressure pressure pressure.Time time time.I just give up.

THE ONE WITH SOME THOUGHTS ON THE FUTURE

When I was a kid, I always wanted to make a difference in the world. I wanted to be a lawyer, to fight tide changing cases. To earn so much money being a successful lawyer (cos we …

THE ONE WITH THE BIRTHDAY RESOLUTIONS

6 birthdays since I started this blog...Time really flies.Birthday resolutions for this yearLose weight... lots of it. Target weight by next birthday -> 48 kgMake more money... lot…

THE ONE WITH 7 DAYS AND A FUNERAL

What a big difference 7 days can make. 7 days ago, I came home to find my father cold in his favourite living room chair. While I can understand the concept of life and death, at t…