PLU, Sayoni & Indignation

When I got in contact with Sharon a few weeks ago, she got all excited when I came out to her and told her I was dating Ash. She then proceeded to introduce me to 3 fairly important terms in the local gay community. PLU or People Like Us is a local gay and lesbian group that focuses on advocacy and public education. Sayoni is a Singaporean-based platform for lesbian, bisexual and transexual Asian woman. Finally, Indignation is Singapore's GLBT pride season that has various exhibitions, talks, film and social events happening in the month of August.

In the months since I've been in this relationship with Ash, I had not thought about seeking out the local gay community. I was fairly sure it existed, seeing as how I knew so many gay and lesbian people. However, none of them were people in my private circle of friends. They were normally friends of friends, or people whom I knew, but didn't know well. This lack of knowledge about them prompted me to attend some of the Indignation events that were happening.

I've been to 3 events so far.

Bifocal was an interesting forum on bisexuality. Although the panel was fairly young and inexperienced, the event was fortunate enough to have attracted some of the more mature crowd, so we were able to hear from some people who have been bisexuals for more then a year. I do think that all the excess labels they were trying to put on everyone wasn't necessary and that its not something thats so clearcut. Sexuality is definately fluid. Its not a matter of choice. Sometimes it just happens. You don't fall in love with a gender. You fall in love with a person.

Tall tales and short stories was entertaining, especially Ovidia's short story. It also set me thinking on what happens as you grow older and your responsibilities to your family increases. Does a gay partner actually add to your burdens? Or is there a way around it? Yi Sheng's rant against the MDA was funny and definately provided a fresh insight on how censorship in Singapore is so rigid.

Relationship myths tonight was very good. It gave me a refreshing insight on relationships in general. Anj Ho did her research very well and I fully agree that straight and gay relationships don't have that much in difference. Although there may be some difficulties in
sustaining a gay relationship, the basic fundamentals of the relationship is still the same as a straight one. We just need to apply positive attitudes and show trust, communication and love to our partners.

All in all, the 3 events opened my eyes to the local gay community. However, I can understand why the attendance at these events were not large. Simply put, I believe most people in Singapore wouldn't see the need be activists as they are perfectly comfortable in their own cocooned lives. There is no need to be flamboyantly gay, especially considering the repercussions it would bring in regards to your personal, professional and sometimes entire life. Singapore is still a rather conservative country in regards to this and the less we try to antagonise the general community, the less the general community would prosecute the minority.

Having said that, I appluad the people at PLU, Sayoni and the volunteers who have actively helped to organise the events that are part of Indignation. While the attendance may not be overwhelming, but at least there is some participation. I don't see PRIDE season becoming a huge thing in Singapore, especially not with how Singapore is still so conservative, but I'm sure in the years to come, it will eventually explode into a national platform. And when that happens, PLU, Sayoni & Indignation will be the forefathers of the PRIDE season in Singapore.

However, I won't be one of those people who becomes an activist. I don't see myself as someone who allows my sexuality to define who I am. Add to that how my few encounters with this community has shown me the clique-ishness of the people within the community and it just makes me to realise that I'm one of the people who will be happily detached from them. We don't have to have lesbian friends just because we're a lesbian couple. We're perfectly happy with our straight friends And I'm sure alot of other Singaporean gay couples agree with me