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*sigh* I just tried visiting another site and got my log that I was typing for 20 mins erased... so now I got to start all over... and I was getting well warmed up too...

Anyhow, back to what I was saying...

Today was a rather melancholy day for me, because I kept brooding on this topic of love {v}. It is confusing me and I just don't know what to do... I don't even know why it is making me unhappy... OH WAIT... I DO KNOW... it's because of this two guys...

Elf - I love him to bits and would do anything for him... live on bread and water for days on end, just to ensure he has money in his pockets... even move across the ocean to be with him... but he's not even mine

Mark - He treats me real good and he wants to be the person to make me happy. In his own words he "wants [me] to be in [his] life, even though [he] doesn't know how" Yet I'm just not sure he is the one...

And I still have my ex-bf in the background, whom I never officially broke up with, but rather just kinda "ignored" I know I have to have some kind of closure with him, but I just don't have the guts, or the strength to do it...

ON the other hand, I got a reply from Taylor's College today... I know it's almost ridiculous to want to study for an advanced diploma in Perth... but then again, if I only want to be there for a year, that would be the best solution... Oh yeah, which reminds me... I been talking to Sharen (a young, idealistic girl who also happens to be neurotic, highly intelligent and well, lovable) and she wants to come to Perth with me I know her mum will throw a fit and she'll always refer to me as "the slut who influenced her daughter not to go to university just because she didn't" Buuuut I don't care... Youths these days have no freedom... and when I come across someone who wants to do something of her own, by all means I am gonna encourage her

Just spoke to my darling... he seems to have quite a few things sorted out and I am feeling happy for him but, he still keeps on harping on his g/f and it just depresses me...

Anyhow... my quote for today... I did midsummer's night dream text for GCE 'O' levels and this was one of my favourite quotes... think it over... and it is horribly true

The course of true love never did run smooth.
(A Midsummer-Night's Dream I.i. 134)