It’s nice to have some rights

This morning I went to the clinic with my wife for our yearly medical check up. We brought baby Vicky along. 

Over the course of 3 hours, we met with a number of healthcare professionals. All of them cooed over baby Vicky and no one seemed surprised or uncomfortable with the fact that two women had a baby together. 

Among them was a medical assistant, who had administered my allergy tests last week. Previously, she had given me a rather odd look when I mentioned my wife. So I was caught by surprise when she casually talked about her wife during our conversation today.

The other person who came out was our primary care provider. We had picked her because in her bio, she had shown interest in promoting good health for the LGBT community. So we knew she was at least gay friendly. So while it wasn’t a surprise when she mentioned that she has talked about having children with her wife, I felt honoured that she choose to come out to me.

Today’s experience makes me appreciate being here in the US. It feels great to be able to comfortably go into any medical setting together with my wife and not be questioned about our relationship. To have a baby with us and not be asked “Who is the real mother?”. I do not take such encounters for granted because I am always reminded of the struggles we face back in Singapore.

The contrast was especially highlighted when I was getting a copy of Vicky’s birth certificate. The effort it took for us to get Zoey’s birth certificate was pretty monumental, so I am glad we managed it this time with minimal fuss. Initially when I got the first copy of Vicky’s birth certificate, it had Mother and Father stated on it. When I pointed it out, the lady at the counter immediately took it back and amended it to Parent. This is what it feels like to be accepted and have rights. 🌈

When will we have this in Singapore?